The Cranberries - rediscovered....

Gosh this takes me back to beginning of my studies in Poznan 1992-1993.....

'Dreams'

I really liked them

Oh my life is changing everyday

Every possible way

Though my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems

Never quite as it seems

I know I felt like this before

But now I’m feeling it even more

Because it came from you

Then I open up and see

The person fumbling here is me

A different way to be

I want more, impossible to ignore

Impossible to ignore

They’ll come true, impossible not to do

Impossible not to do

Now I tell you openly

You have my heart so don’t hurt me

For what I couldn’t find

Talk to me amazing mind

So understanding and so kind

You’re everything to me

Oh my life is changing everyday

Every possible way

Though my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems

’cause you’re a dream to me

Dream to me

Bring it on.......

Gosh.....the time is simply flying. I can’t believe my last post on this blog was on 9th of July (almost 3 weeks ago). I have now started receiving questions from you guys asking what has happened ? Why I have suddenly stopped writing..... To be honest i do not have answer to that. I guess it was a combination of very busy work schedule as well as the fact that there was nothing to write about from my HIV treatment point of view. I have mentioned in one of the earlier posts that i would like to avoid this blog to become a simple diary of what I was doing each day (I use Facebook for that....lol) and concentrate more on the HIV treatment itself. Fortunately for me the treatment is doing extremely good. I am taking the pills regularly, hardly have any side effect, feeling generally very good. I have said before and i will say it again, I really am very very very lucky so far. I hope this will continue.

I am not sure if I have already mentioned in one of previous post a very good TV series I am following  - ‘The big C’ - a story of a middle aged school teacher (Laura Linney) whose cancer diagnosis was just the kick she needed to ditch her reserved, conservative ways and start living life to the fullest. Tired of putting everyone else’s needs ahead of her own, she is committed to doing things her way from now on. The transition from milquetoast suburban wife and mother to master of her own destiny has not been easy, but that was nothing compared to the challenge she’s taking on now, beating stage four melanoma. It is really a very good piece of TV, little bit funny, little bit sad but first and foremost it is very real. I really recommend it. 

Season 2 has started few weeks ago and i believe the first season is already available on DVD....alternatively you can download it from the net.

SING !

Sing it out

Boy, you got to see what tomorrow brings

Sing it out

Girl, you’ve got to be what tomorrow needs

For every time that they want to count you out

Use your voice every single time you open up your mouth

Sing it for the boys

Sing it for the girls

Every time that you lose it sing it for the world

Sing it from the heart

Sing it till you’re nuts

Sing it out for the ones that’ll hate your guts

Sing it for the deaf

Sing it for the blind

Sing about everyone that you left behind

Sing it for the world

Sing it for the world

Sing it out, boy they’re gonna sell what tomorrow means

Sing it out, girl before they gonna kill what tomorrow brings

You’ve got to make a choice

If the music drowns you out

And raise your voice

Every single time they try and shut your mouth

Sing it for the boys

Sing it for the girls

Every time that you lose it sing it for the world

Sing it from the heart

Sing it till you’re nuts

Sing it out for the ones that’ll hate your guts

Sing it for the deaf

Sing it for the blind

Sing about everyone that you left behind

Sing it for the world

Sing it for the world

Cleaned up, corporation progress

Dying in the process

Children that can talk about it,

living on the railways

People moving sideways

Sell it till your last days

Buy yourself a motivation

Generation Nothing,

Nothing but a dead scene

Product of white dream

I am not the singer that you wanted

But a dancer

I refuse to answer

Talk about the passer

Ruling for the ones who want to get away

Keep running!

Sing it for the boys

Sing it for the girls

Every time that you lose it sing it for the world

Sing it from the heart

Sing it till you’re nuts

Sing it out for the ones that’ll hate your guts

Sing it for the deaf

Sing it for the blind

Sing about everyone that you left behind

Sing it for the world

Sing it for the world

We’ve got to see what tomorrow brings

Sing it for the world

Sing it for the world

Girl you got to be what tomorrow needs

Sing it for the world

Sing it for the world 

By: 'My Chemical Romance"

Purple rain, purple rain....

Gosh I love Friday afternoons !!! Especially after busy and stressful week like this one. The weekend is here and to make things even better I'm traveling home to Scotland tomorrow  very early morning and coming back to Sopot only on Monday night.

Since yesterday Gdynia hosts a Polish version of ‘Glastonbury Festival’ called OPENER. I am referring to Glastonbury as, apart  of great reputation the OPENER festival has gained over past few years, also the weather seem to be very similar to what my friends have been reporting on FACEBOOK from Glastonbury last week. After many weeks of great sunny weather today the sky is covered with gray and black clouds and the rain didn’t stop since the lunch time....there will be mud at the festival grounds...lots of MUD. The line up this time is not as good as last year, however tomorrow I will miss a performance which I’d like to see live: PRINCE. I have to admit that I am not a great fan, nevertheless I believe it will be a great show and the atmosphere will be simply ELECTRIC...perhaps the rain will turn into PURPLE. 

Other than that there is nothing to report from my side. I feel great, i don’t have any complaints, nor side effects are troubling me. Long may it last. 

Wishing everyone a great weekend and all my readers/follower in the US a great long weekend and Happy 4th of July.

OPENER FESTIVAL - link

Why does it always rain on me ??

Today was officially the worst day at work since I have arrived in Poland. For past few days we were under lots of pressure from 2 biggest customers. We were literarily turning the world upside down in order to get everything organized with container deliveries and also positioning for loadings and today everything and i mean everything started to go wrong and the worst part of it that the reason for these unfortunate events were beyond our control and we simply couldn’t influence them at all. Stuck in the middle between angry subcontractors being on our case as we hold them from earning their money as well as customer on the other side not interested in the fact that we can’t do anything if the vessel is delayed. At that point i'd like to say that operations are not really my favorite part of the freight forwarding business. On top of that i am trying to prepare for the area managers meeting next week in Stockholm as I was requested to do presentation about the Polish office and it’s development plans. I have managed to draft the bullet point over the weekend, however I didn’t have chance to work on the presentation yet.... So, what I am trying to say is that I am under more than a little pressure right now. Having said I also want to mention that this is only work..... 'Don't cry over something, that can't cry over you'  - as David grandma would say.....

On the ball.....

I have found an article (please see the below link) on the Red Ribbon Army’s Facebook page. To be perfectly honest I was slightly confused. I’ve felt like i am having a ‘deja vu’. In the last quarter of last year when my doctor started to prepare me psychologically for my treatment, he was explaining me things using almost the same arguments. He didn’t mentioned where the studies were made, however the outcome was almost exactly the same.  He told me that the new guidelines in UK say that the best time to start treatment is when CD4 count is approaching 350. Now.....is our good old NHS so ahead of the rest of the world with various studies regarding the HIV ?....or perhaps the website is not really ‘on the ball’ with latest treatment updates ? It is for me hard to believe that such important findings would not be shared with international HIV community and if that is the case then this really really scares me.

http://www.aidsmap.com/starting-HIV-therapy

Maths against HIV....

Very interesting article - please find the link below. It seems that my primary school math  teacher was right saying that absolutely everything, the whole world, whole universe, the whole 'being', evolves around numbers.....
http://www.aidsmeds.com/articles/hiv_math_model

On the right track.....

It seems that we are on the right track.... Just called my doctor. The viraload came back as less than 40, meaning UNDETECTABLE !! On top of that the CD4 count is also going back up..... 375. 

I am simply over the moon !

127 hours.......

It’s a public holiday in Poland today - Corpus Christi, church processions all over the country and everything is closed. I was planning to go to the office anyway in order to catch up on some issues, however I really don’t feel like it right now....perhaps a little bit later. 

Last night I have watched very inspiring Danny Boyle’s movie from 2010 called ‘127 hours’. It’s a true story of a mountain climber, Aaron Ralston, who on 25th April 2003 went on a canyoneering (I looked that one up - I didn’t have clue what this type of sport/outdoor activity is called) trip to the Canyonlands National Park in Utah only to return armless, after 5 traumatic days trapped in a canyon. The deep desire to live pushed Aron to a desperate measures to save his own live. He amputated his own arm trapped under the rock in the middle of a dessert, hundreds miles away from any sign of civilization. Today, despite having only one arm he is still doing things he always loved - climbs, cycles, hikes, etc....  The movie has just made me thinking what an extraordinary creatures we - humans - are. We so often do underestimate the power of our minds, that when only positively stimulated, can make us do extraordinary things. Things, that we would never have thought, we are capable of. Truelly inspiring story. 

Still waiting...

First of all I am sorry once again for past few days of silence. I really had a very busy weekend and beginning of this week. First of all, as I have wrote in the last post, David was here since Saturday morning and also Wiktor and Tomek came over from Warsaw. We had fantastic time and I was (as usual) depressed when I was dropping David to the airport. The first day being apart is always causing this reaction and I simply need to accept it....for time being anyway. Apart of that work at the moment is very demanding and last 2 days i was sitting in the office till almost 8 pm. Having said that I don’t mean to complain, as although busy and demanding it is at the same time interesting.

The results from last blood tests should be in 2 weeks after the blood was taken, which was on Monday, I usually leave it a day or two longer before I call..... in case my doctor wanted to call me. I have called today and learned that the results are not in yet and that I should try to call tomorrow again. I know i shouldn’t really panic as the fact that these results are late doesn’t mean anything, yet today after the call I became a little anxious.  I really want the pills to work, I was working very hard for past 2 months and made sure that I am taking the medication on time every day. I do want this to work, learning that the Viraload is up again after the such great decrease after first 4 weeks would be a real blow. New medication would mean that my body would have adjust again to the new drugs and I would most probably have to worry again about new side effects. I will, if i have to, however I don’t want to. Not right now, not yet....I have only started these drugs, these should be useful a little bit longer...well that’s actually a lie - much MORE than ‘a little bit”.

David visiting Sopot.....

Yet again - TGI....or shall I say TFGI Friday. What a week at work. It seems that the initial quietness and stress free time I had in Poland after Riga, where stress  was simply my life, is over. I am getting involved in more and more with the local shipping community, I am meeting new potential partners, receiving more and more request, helping my younger colleague solve some difficult problems that arise every single day. Anyone who works in transport and logistics will know what i am talking about. At this point I would like to say that I am very much impressed with Lukasz - the young guy I am working with. Very smart cookie, who has impressed me with some statements regarding business issues, communication, and even HR issues. I will be definitely talking to my area manager to keep close eye on the guy and invest in him. He really has potential.

There is however other reason I am soooo looking forward to this weekend. Finally after 5 months my better half was able to allow himself a Monday off work and therefore booked the flight to come over this weekend. He is working too hard and on top of that the weather in Scotland isn’t great this spring. He deserves a wee break in slightly better climate. On top of that my sister and her husband is arriving from Warsaw as well. (I assume I don’t need to explain that this is not my real sister ?!?!) It will be simply a great weekend. Even if the weather forecast is as FANTASTIC as it was for past 4 weeks, it is still much warmer than Scotland, hence I do hope David won’t be disappointed. The plan is to have nice, relaxing walks, good food in the company of great friends.

Hey now, take Your pills....

U Berlin by REM:

Hey now, take your pills and

Hey now, make your breakfast 

Hey now, comb your hair and off to work 

Crash land, no illusions, 

No collision, no intrusion 

My imagination runs away 

I know, I know, I know what I am chasing 

I know, I know, I know that this is changing me 

I am flying on a star into a meteor tonight 

I am flying on a star, star, star 

I will make it through the day 

And then the day becomes the night 

I will make it through the night 

Hey now, take the U-Bahn, five stops, change the station 

Hey now, don't forget that change will save you 

Hey now, count a thousand-million people, that's astounding 

Chasing through the city with their stars on bright 

I know, I know, I know what I am chasing 

I know, I know, I know that this is changing me 

I am flying on a star into a meteor tonight 

I am flying on a star, star, star 

I will make it through the day 

And then the day becomes the night 

I will make it through the night 

I don't mind repeating, I am not complete 

I have never been the gifted type 

Hey, man, tell me something, are you off to somewhere? 

Do you want to go with me tonight? 

I know, I know, I know that this is changing 

We walk the streets to feel the ground I'm chasing: ÜBerlin 

I am flying on a star into a meteor tonight 

I am flying on a star, star, star 

I will make it through the day 

And then the day and then the day becomes the night 

I will make it through the night

...On the bonnie, bonnie banks of Loch Lomond

It was very busy Saturday morning. Already at 8 am was pushing a trolley through TESCO’s, filling it with goodies. I haven’t done any big shopping for ages and I really needed to some clening stuff as well as drinking water and juices, coffee, sugar, etc... David is arriving next weekend and my fridge and freezer was totally empty. Back in the flat by 10 am unpacked and had breakfast. Scrubbed the bath and after that started to clean windows. I’ve finished cleaning at  2 am the sweat was dripping from me. The flat is still not even close to clean, however enough exercise for one day. I will finish the bits and bobs tomorrow and during the week. I had a nice long shower and after that went for a nice walk on the beach. The beach was very busy and even few people were braved enough to actually swim in the sea. I only took my sandals off and made my feet wet. Trust me, that was enough of the thermal shock to actually feel my balls hitting the brain (as David would say). I think I will wait for another 3 weeks before i actually try to dive under the surface of the Baltic Sea.

Back at the apartment i was sitting on the sofa browsing the YouTube. Somehow I got all sentimental. All stared when I’ve found a Flower of Scotland video from the football game at Hampden back in 2007  where Scotland played France. After that all wend down hill I was searching for different Scottish songs and by the time I’ve listened to ‘Loch Lomond’ performed by the ‘The Corries’, I was crying like a baby, trying to sing with the video at the same time. Sometimes I have days like that where I simply need to cry my eyes out for a while, feeling sorry for myself. You may think I shouldn’t really have reasons for that and I guess You are probably right. I do have great partner, I have great job, I have fantastic friends, I am currently living in a sea side resort with my flat located 2 minutes walk from the beach. So...why ??  I don’t really have answer for you, I think however that the main reason is that David is not here with me.

I am sitting now on a terrace of one of the many coffee shops on the Monciak in Sopot (the main pedestrian street) drinking fabulous caffe latte, eating warm apple pie with ice cream and watching the world passing by. The ‘drama’ is over, I feel better. David is coming here next weekend. I am sooooo looking forward to it.

Heading down under.....

I am so happy it’s weekend. I am very tired today. Main reasons are very busy week at work as well as the weather. I had a big trouble sleeping as it was very hot. The apartment doesn’t have air conditioning which is not really unusual here in Poland. In fact I would say it is very unusual to find an apartment with air conditioning. I am afraid the old fashioned fan will have to do the trick. Yesterday we finally got some rain and the temperatures dropped a little. I have slept much better last night and I am planing to have really relaxing weekend with lots of sleep. I have been sweating a lot over past few nights however I do think this has something to do with the weather rather than the HIV. Weekend in Scotland with 12 degrees during the day didn’t make me sweat....in case you are wondering why I have made the previous statement.....

For few years now David and I are talking about visiting Australia. It is one of the few places i always wanted to visit since i was a kid. I will now finally have chance to do that. Yesterday after long preparations we have finally booked the flights to Sydney. We will be heading ‘down under’ for their 2012 Mardi Gras celebrations which are taking place in the second half of February with the Main Parade on the first weekend of March.  We are flying with Virgin Atlantic from Edinburgh via Heathrow and Hong Kong. With a 2 day stop of on the way back in Hong Kong. I still can not believe it. I am so excited.

I was 8 years old.....

Probably not many of us know that last Sunday was marked as 30th anniversary of first reported cases of AIDS. Gosh i can’t believe I was only 8 years old. I do recall seeing some news on the Polish TV channels and as you can imagine I really didn’t think much of it then, certainly i didn’t think I will be living with the virus myself one day. Below a link to very interesting article I have found on the net on the subject: “30 Things to know on the 30th Anniversary of AIDS”

http://blogs.poz.com/regan/archives/2011/06/30_things_to_know_on.html

Enjoy !

Irresistible smell of Polish strawberries....

Getting up at 5 am is not natural, you can argue whatever you like, but I will not  agree that  such a early rise is good for you. No chance !!! Unfortunately I had to get up so early this morning after arriving last night in Poznan... 4 hours drive and full day in the office with over 27 degrees outside and no air con is not fun trust me. I am sooo glad the day is almost over, it looks like the weather cooling down a little bit as well, as from tomorrow for few days the temperatures shouldn’t get so high. After the 12 degrees in Glasgow over the weekend my body is getting a thermal shock. 

First thing I have done this morning after arriving in the office was booking the flight for my next appointment in 12 weeks time. Found a good deal with Wizz Air and with the Wizz Club membership i have received further GBP discount. As much as I am very sceptical about any ‘memberships’ or ‘club’ discounts offered by so many different companies I have to say that in my case joining the WIzz Club was a good move. The discounts I have received from them over past 5 months have already paid for the yearly membership fees and i am able to enjoy the discounts for further months to come.

When i was walking today back to the office after lunch I was passing by a fruit shop and an irresistible smell of fresh polish strawberries have filled my nose. It is the time of the year in Poland when you can buy strawberries that actually taste like strawberries. They don’t look like the strawberries you can get in supermarket the whole year round - big and perfect red imitation of real strawberries. These are far from perfect, all sizes and shapes however tasty... very tasty. I had to get  2 lb. of those. When I’ve arrived back home I washed them  (yes, unusual for me, but I am simply conscious about the E coli outbreak with 22 people dead so far) put some sugar on them and a little cream (very little - honestly) and.... these are history now, the bowl is already washed and put away. Simply gorgeous !!!!! I can see myself buying at least 1 lb. on my way home every day and have with sugar  after the dinner..... and perhaps a little cream

To be undetectable....

The results that I have reported few weeks ago (Viral-Load at 167 and CD4 count at 315) were confirmed today during the appointment. A new consultant has seen me today as my doctor had to go to Australia on a family business. Generally the doctors are very happy with my results however we are not yet there where I should be.  There is nothing to worry about as the above results which reflect the blood counts after 4 weeks of treatment are better than they have anticipated (Viral-Load should get down from the level of 7000 just before the treatment to approx. 1000 after 4 weeks of treatment - my came down to 167). The goal is that the level will decrease to below 40 which then will make the virus undetectable. Usually the are expecting this to happen in the period from 3 till 6 months from the beginning of the treatment. So far they are pretty positive that we will achieve that . I will call the clinic in two weeks time to find out the results, Other than that there is not much more the report. All other blood results (sugar, cholesterol, etc) are very good. So the visit it self didn’t long. We agreed to the next appointment in 3 months time (I know - this is fantastic !!!!) subject to the results in 2 weeks time being good. In case there is something unusual with my blood counts the clinic will contact me and make a separate appointment. I have then went to the pharmacy and picked up my drugs for 3 months. Walking out of the hospital with a huge paper bag full of drugs I was very happy. The good feeling however didn’t last very long. David took me for a nice lunch in Nandos and only then I have started to realise that in few hours I will be kissing him cheerio once again and heading to Edinburgh Airport to fly back to Poland. David had his own doctor appointment hence he couldn’t take me to the airport, however the ‘in-laws’ (Florence and Jim) have generously offered to take me to the airport. On the way to the airport I was ‘working’ on Flo to finally come to Poland. She is very apprehensive as she (and as matter of fact also Jim) never actually took a flight, however I believe there is big chance, they might finally do it. At this point I would like to stress all of you that are thinking about visiting Poland that there is a very limited amount of time I will be based in Poland and it’s extremely unlikely (basically - not possible) that my stay will be extended. I would therefore suggest to check Your diaries and start get on the Wizz Air or Ryan Air to check the availability of the flights.

...and the 2 become 1

I am not kidding: 12 degrees Celsius on 4th of June. This only possible in Glasgow. For past 4 weeks its cold and is raining here almost every day. Then suddenly, yesterday a GLORIOUS day apparently (I can’t really say as was in Poland and only arrived 10:40 pm) and back to cold, windy and gray again today. I guess yesterday was ‘Summer’ for Glasgow for this year.  We shouldn’t expect anymore sunshine in 2011. Despite the crap weather, I am glad and very happy to be back home. Short, however as usual very busy visit. Meeting Colin (David’s cousin) for few afternoon beers and then going for a curry with John and Tom. Hot Tub (my best friend) before bed time will be simply the perfect finish of the perfect day. Tomorrow coffee and cake with Richard and Alan in town. Not sure where yet, but I fancy nice cake and good coffee. I am sure boys know good place for that. So, the wind and the 12 degrees will not scare me off or depress me. It is June, it is spring, I am home in Glasgow - life is great ! You may say that I am now slightly pushing here and perhaps sounds desperate, but I simply refuse to give in because of weather. I’ll see my friends and I’ll have fun this weekend. That’s it. I need and want to keep this positive attitude and be happy on Monday morning when I go to the clinic. I have to admit that i can’t stop wondering what my doctor will tell me on Monday, I recall from the early talks about in some cases the treatment that I am taking are being replaced with one pill (combined) if the treatment is going well. Perhaps I am the case ? I don’t really want to build my hopes, nevertheless the though is making me feel good.  Just need to wait and see.

A Day in Poznan....

What a beautiful day it was today in Poznan. The first strokes of sun which has started to rise from behind the cathedral on the other side of the river woke me up just before 5 am. I have turned the blinds a little tighter and came back to bed. I’ve slept for another 2 hours. I got up and jump into shower. My meeting with one of the trucking company was set for 10 am. Not far from the flat, however I had to consider the morning rush traffic. The meeting went extremely well. The company is very much interested in co-operation with us. Hope we finally start doing some European orders with them. Back in the flat for midday check the emails, send one customer an offer and by 2 am I was done. Free afternoon in old town. The sun was splitting the sky. I was sipping cold Carlsberg while sitting outside one of the many bars and pubs on Poznan’s old square. Watching the pre-weekend world passing by. Later on I had a nice lunch in my favorite restaurant Sphinx for which I have weakness since I was a student in this town almost 20 years ago (Gosh that feels......OLD). I was one of their first customers. Yes, I was eating there at day 1 of the very first restaurant. Today Sphinx is a chain of many restaurants in almost every bigger city in Poland. After lunch I came back home for a snooze and also I needed to get ready for the flight. I have arranged with my neighbor who is a taxi driver that he will take me to the airport. He also will pick me up on Monday when I come back to Poznan.  The flight is due at the Edinburgh Airport at 10:25 pm, so today is the very first time I will be taking my medication on the plane at 30 thousand feet. Not that this means anything, just another day, another place. This is part of my life now and am learning that life doesn’t stop, because I have to be home before 10 pm to take my pills. On the flight, in the cinema or in the pub. Anywhere really, I simply need to REMEMBER to take them.

Happy Birthday Dad....

Long and busy day at the office and then a long drive from Sopot to Poznan. On my way I have stopped at my parents for a coffee as it is my Dad’s birthday today. It was nice as he didn’t expect to see me at all. My mu was calling me last week that i wouldn’t forget to call him with the birthday wishes (Yes, I know my Mum is great). I haven’t called the whole day and I know that she was already getting angry with me, but then I’ve simply appeared at the door with a huge orchid plant in my hands. He was chuffed. They both were. My mum has ordered the birthday cake only for Saturday as there will be family gathering for sure, however there is always some kind of home made cake in my mum's kitchen, so we had a piece each with coffee and a chat. Short, however very nice visit.  Once again, Happy Birthday Dad....

I have arrived in Poznan around 9 pm, changed from my work cloths and went for a walk and something to eat to the old town. It’s the time of the year when Old Square is looking pretty again. Tables are out on the square and i shall say at this point lots of people having coffees, beer, etc...however I was actually surprised how quiet it was. Despite very nice weather (after 9 pm and still very warm) lots of places were totally empty, waiters standing bored not even interested to try to invite people in. It made me a little sad to be honest. I never seen Poznan’s Old square so empty even during the week. There were always at least students, having said that I guess Old Square become a little too expensive for students nowadays. I had a kebab in my favorite kebab place (just off the old square), took my pills and now getting ready for bed as I have another busy day tomorrow. Meetings in the morning near Poznan and then flying to Glasgow in the evening. On Monday morning I have  appointment at the clinic. Really looking forward to the weekend at home (even if the weather will be crap....)

Tropical weather in Poland....

Yet another lovely day here in Sopot. The temperatures have reached 28 degrees during the day. It is hard to sit in the office as the air conditioning is kind of dated back to the ‘soviet times’, however after work I am enjoying Sopot very much. Cycling, inline skating, walking. The beach is nice and clean (the water is Baltic i have to admit) the promenade its almost 20 km hence the above mentioned exercised become such more pleasurable. This is also the reason why the blog is not getting updated as systematically as previously. I simply don’t have enough time in the day. I do hope to get into better shape once i am here (especially to loose the beer belly) and therefore I do hope you will forgive me the gaps in the updates that might occur in the future. After 2 miserable years in Riga its time i take care of my body. Especially now when the medication was introduced, i need to ensure I live healthier life than before. I have already started to eat healthier starting the day with corn flakes instead of scramble egg or fried sausage. I am sure pretty soon i will be fit again. When i went in-line skating for the very first time here on the truck, i have lasted 2 laps and I couldn't breath anymore and my legs were shaking. Now i can do 4 laps and i am still ok and don’t need to sit down. I have forgotten how much fun the inline-skating is. I used to skate a lot back when I was at UNI almost every day around the Malta lake in Poznan and i feel i am getting into it it again.

Anyway, I do hope that at least some of you will manage to visit me here. Only few days ago I have read in the online news paper that during the whole month of June we can expect in Poland a tropical weather. Baltic sea with its famous cold waters might in that case be a real pleasure. I am monitoring the weather in Scotland on daily basis and i think it is worth to think about short break here... remember you’ve got a free accommodation.

Routines, patterns, similarities....

Coming back home from the pub last night after watching FC Barcelona performance on Wembley I’ve wished I was on La Rambla right this moment. The atmosphere must have been amazing. Catalonians where simply outstanding. They played great football and they’ve deserved the Champion’s League title. I could only imagine what Barcelona was like that evening. Knowing the Spanish, they were partying till the dawn (if no longer). Once again, CONGRATULATIONS BARCA. Well done.

I’ve had few beers in the pub last night (4 to be exact). I felt a little tipsy. I have took my pills once back home and still watched some TV and I have to say i didn’t feel any worse even 2 hours latter. Previously the pills have enhanced the feeling of being drunk or dizzy, however last night I’ve felt fine. Also this morning i feel fresh as a daisy. No hangover or other side effects. Is it possible my body has again adjusted itself to the combination of the meds and some alcohol ? I will not pretend that this fact was totally unimportant to me. I do enjoy an occasional drink with friends. In any case I still do feel that i haven’t really figured out much about what is triggering the side effects I am getting. It is still very much a learning process and I guess it will stay as such for a while yet. I the meantime need to concentrate to learn to live with these side effect and record as much details from my daily routine, stress level, lifestyle, exercise (I do squash and inline-skating nowadays), food and drink consumed, times I was eating/drinking etc. on order to be able to analyze any similarities. I know that I will find a pattern soon.

Football night.....

Football night tonight. The final of the Champion’s League: Manchester United vs. FC Barcelona. Played at Wembley Stadium @ 7:45 GMT. Wish I was there. Instead i will be watching the game in my local pub in Sopot. The whole day today I was wondering who shall i support tonight. The reason for that is that these are my 2 favorite teams (apart of Celtic that is) and I have great dilemma. Having said that I still recall a great feeling I have experienced while watching Barca at their ‘Camp Nou’ few years ago. So, I think my support tonight tends a little more towards Catalonians. In any case I believe it will be a great football match and the better team shall pick up the trophy after the game is finished.

Over 1000 page hits......

First of all  I would like to THANK YOU all once again for reading this blog. Few minutes ago I was checking the stats I can now confirm that we have now officially exceeded 1000 page views (1004 to be exact at the time I was checking). I am totally amazed. Almost 8 weeks ago when started this blog i wanted and needed to open myself, I wanted and needed to say how and what I felt. It was part of process how I have dealt with the fact that my life was changing due to the fact that I need to start medication for HIV. I didn’t know how long it will last and i really can assure you that knowing myself I didn’t really expected the whole project to last that long and reached over 1000 hits. Over this 8 weeks You’ve had a chance to read about my feelings, my physical well being as well as simple diary of events that have not a direct connection to HIV as such. You’ve also had a chance to read some of my poor attempts to write poetry as well as some really good pieces suggested by my friends to share on this blog. There is no doubt that the BLOG has helped me tremendously to deal with above mentioned changes in my life and at the same time I hope You have enjoyed reading it.

Originally I have intended the blog for my friends, however when checking at the statistics it became clear that I have reached to other people in sometimes very far corners of the world. At this point I can already hear my friend Martin saying >quote< I have told you to use Twitter. You will be amazed how many more people will start follow your story >unquote<. Thanks Martin for explaining me the Twitter idea. I will get round to it soon. I promise. Anyway I was thinking I will also give you some real numbers about You - my readers:

First of all are the stats of page views per country:

United Kingdom 638

Poland 201

United States 87

Spain 46

Germany 8

India 8

Isle of Man 5

Denmark 4

Singapore 3

Australia 1

Secondly the stats of page views per operating system: 

iPad 331 (34%)

Windows 286 (29%)

Macintosh 233 (24%)

iPhone 102 (10%)

Linux 9 (<1%)

Other 5 (<1%)

And Finally the stats of page views per browser:

Safari 622 (61%)

Internet Explorer 231 (23%)

Firefox 114 (11%)

Apple-PubSub 36 (3%)

Mobile 1 (<1%)

My first observation in the above is that Apple products are very popular amongst my friends, but I will let you do your own analysis and come to your own conclusions which of course I would welcome very much in a form of a comment.

Wishing You all a very good and relaxing weekend.....and please keep reading.

Flight cancelled...

I am anxiously following all the news about the new ash cloud after the eruption of the volcano on Iceland. As you all probably remember last year the whole Europe was paralyzed for days. I was also a victim as my flight from Riga to Scotland was cancelled.

It wasn’t a major issue then, well I missed a concert of Rufus Wainwright in Edinburgh. Thanks God the ticket was used by a good friend and as they say what friend gets is not lost. This time however the problem is of totally different matter. On 6th June i have my doctor appointment in the clinic as the prescription will be finished on 7th. Meaning if I won’t make the flight on Friday 3rd as booked i will run out of tablets, and this is NOT GOOD !!! I am really not sure how the Polish medical system works and if the drugs I am talking are permitted on Polish market or even available. Today the airspace over Scotland  and north of England was closed. The experts are talking about only short term distractions, however last year nobody forecasted the flying ban over Europe would last almost 2 weeks. As much as I am not big fan of RyanAir I did like their initiative today by doing a test flights over Scotland, collecting and analyzing data in order to prove that the security measures in UK are simply ridiculous. Yes, I do understand that the authorities don’t want to take the responsibilities, however if Ryan Air can gather an independent team to analyze the situation then what are the authorities doing ???? Well, perhaps I am too cynical and not understand the complexity of the problem and potential risk, but i do have feeling that people in charge of these things aren’t much more advance with their knowledge that I am.

On the quest to find the fountain of youth....

There is nothing better than cinema if you feel half of the hangover from the day before. You don’t really want to do much, yet you  feel you need to get out of the house......

The state of me yesterday afternoon was exactly as just described, hence I have decided to check what movies are currently shown on the big screen in Sopot. There were few movies I was actually considering, however I have settled for the ‘Pirates of the Caribbean 4’ in 3D. Medium salty popcorn and large coke later I was sitting in a large auditorium with a 3D glasses on. It seems that the 3D technology is starting to dominate the cinema.I was amazed of number of films in that format currently showing. I agree that there is many movies that for sure will gain the artistic value from 3D, however in many cases it is simply overrated feature and the effects are simply disappointing. I have to admit that I have thought movie like Pirates of the Caribbean would add enormous value to the whole movie experience, however the effects are rather.....well..... I would say just OK. Movie it self was good, few bad cuts and i am also not sure about Penelope Cruz - somehow she wasn’t very convincing. Johnny Deep on another hand delivered yet another brilliant performance as Captain Jack Sparrow. Overall great entertainment. If you a have seen the previous parts then you must see it. If you didn’t than.... well is not fantastic cinema, but is good entertainment. Most important that the music theme mixed by DJ Tiesto for the first part of the Pirates of the Caribbean is still dominating throughout the whole movie - FAB.

Back home straight after the cinema and in bed before midnight as today I was going to visit my parents and have home cocked lunch. FAB !!!

Margaritas for everyone....

What i night !!!! Great food, great company, great laugh. After kind of slow start on beers, we all decided to simply go for it and ordered their famous house margaritas. From that moment, the margaritas were arriving to our table in big jugs...I have lost count after 8 jug so not sure how many we had but it was plenty. It very much reminded me of my last spontaneous 'margarita party' with Wiktor and David and Maja in Battery Park NYC 3 years ago, the only difference was that in NYC we drank Strawberry Margaritas. Yes, I have to say I am starting to see why people like this place. Previously, when with customers I always let them order mix platter kind of dish to share and I think that was the reason why I didn’t really liked it. Last night I had jalapenos stuffed with cheese deep fried in butter to start with..... HOT HOT HOT. Followed by dish called: ‘Chimichanga’ - which was fajita dough pancake with chili com carne served with mexican sweet rice and bean paste....absolutely GORGEOUS. Only today, I feel how hot my dinner actually was. The expression ‘my ass is on fire’ is simply understatement ! So, all that gorgeous food we had and the margaritas and it turned out to be PLN 100.00 per head which is approx. GBP 20.00. Seriously cheap. Apart of that the place was full of Latin-American hunks. Must be rugby players or something....lots of eye candy.....

I am feeling a bit rough around the edges today, but not major hangover. I hope i will have chance to enjoy the day, cycling or inline-skating perhaps. The boys are driving to the country side - Mr M and his brother have a summer place out of town. I am invited and I’ve said I will come, but really not sure can face another party today. Tomorrow i am driving to my parents for lunch so I want to be fresh for that. I think it was very first time I got really really drunk since i have started the treatment. It wasn’t very late night so can’t say if the pills have increased the ‘drunk’ feeling. I was taking them as we were leaving the restaurant and 30 min later I was already in bed. Thats the way forward for me. When I do party, then it is late afternoon / early evening. I think i need to discuss with David the ‘Summer Party’ concept.

Nachos with cheeseeeee...........??? No thank you...

TGI Friday !!! It was a very long and hard week at work. I am really looking forward to this weekend. I am going out with my pal Grzegorz (Gregory) from Poznan, who is visiting ‘3City’ on business. Few weeks back you have read a post about a great re-union in Poznan - this is the same Gregory. We are going to a Mexican restaurant called ‘Pueblo’ suggested by him. Funny thing is that since my arrival here few customers and subcontractors have also suggested this restaurant when I was meeting with them. So i know the place pretty well, however i am not sure what the whole fuss is about. I really don’t see anything special about this place, food atmosphere is ...just OK i would say. So perhaps Gregory or the mystery man called ‘M’ who is joining us will tell me today. Gregory recently came out from a very long relationship with a guy named Martin. When he told me he is in ‘3City’ I was asking him where he is staying and the answer came’ In Gdynia, because a new ‘M’ has appeared here (the word he used in Polish could also mean ‘has opened’) and numpty heid me thought he is talking about some hotel like ‘Marriott’ or something... but as it turns out it is a new man called Mark.... Anyway I am very much looking forward to dinner. Wishing you all great weekend..... XXX

Sopot's Pier..

I am sitting on the Sopot’s Pier, enjoying very warm spring evening, watching the world pass by. I had to pay PLN 5.5 (approx. GBP 1.25) to actually be allowed to enter the pier which i find it simply ridiculous. During our recent holidays we were visiting Bournemouth in UK and the entry ticket for their pier was GBP 0.60. Here is more than double the price and although Sopot seem to be posh place i don’t think it is as posh as Bournemouth. Having said all that why the hell pay to enter any pier in the first place. It is nothing really that exciting about them... just bridge going out 100 - 200 meters into the sea. Right, already sense that you want to ask me why did I pay then ...well... all i can say is that it will not happen again. I guess I wanted to go out of the flat and sit down somewhere nice to write few words for my blog. I can’t believe that it is after 8 pm and in May and I am sitting in shorts and t-shirt enjoying this calm moments.The systematic sounds of waves reaching the beach is very relaxing and almost hypnotizing.  Down beside the pier, first beach volleyballs players opening their summer season. Couples walking along the beach holding hands, catching last strokes of the sun which setting down behind the Grand Hotel. First stalls with tacky gifts trying to attract tourist. The air is very misty over the sea, however in far distance I see queue of vessels waiting to get into the Gdynia port. I really think i was very lucky finding the apartment I am living in right now. I wish David could be here with me. I  feel he going through a very rough time right now feeling fed up. To be honest hearing daily report about the weather in Scotland I am not surprised. Wish there was a way he could come over here and perhaps open similar business he has in Scotland. First however I need to try to get him to visit here and also will suggest him to bring his Mum and her partner. I am very sure they would enjoy this place as well. 

Anyway, time to get moving, i still would like to go get some exercise today. The inline-skating track is only minutes from my flat.

13 slices....

After busy day at work myself and Lukasz (my colleague) were scheduled for 1 hour squash in not far away gym. I have to admit I wasn’t really looking forward to it, however because we have changed the reservation so many times already I wasn’t prepared to suggest it to change again, so we went. I have to also admit, that i am now actually glad we did go. It was 1 hour of a very good exercise......and I have won the game ! My very first game played officially for points and I have won all 5 sets. I have feeling Lukasz wasn’t really playing his best and with that I basically mean he did let me win. I guess there was a reason in his madness. He perfectly knew that if i lose i will most probably not come back to play squash again, now he has me kind of hooked on this heavy duty sport. There is no doubt that squash will burn my calories like there is no tomorrow. I think with the combination of inline-skating and the squash I will get very fit very quickly. In addition there was a very nice gesture of the gym reception staff when we were leaving. We have received 2 packets (each) of a cereal with fruit ‘Muessli” as a promotion. That means as from tomorrow I will be starting each day with a healthy breakfast too....I feel I am loosing weight already from thinking of all these good things that are happening. I need a fry up for dinner I think..... or perhaps shall I cure my ‘itchy eyes’ by having a kebab... (sorry it’s personal joke of AT, TJ, DK and myself). At the end I went to local supermarket and got some cold meats and cheese and nice bread and tomatoes...... nice, healthy options of a Polish evening snackette...

Anyway... while I was standing in the queue to cold meats counter I was watching a couple in front of me discussing what they should order comes their turn and I was totally amazed when eventually they started ordering. The lassie almost on one breath said: “Could we please have 3 slices of cooked ham, 5 slices of...; no 6 slices - the husband interrupted; yes, 6 slices of chicken ham and 4 slices of headcheese. Thank You” I started to think about it...here they are ordering 13 slices of cold meats after their long discussion, are they really so well organized with their lives to know that this is exact amount of slices ? Please note that this couple didn’t look like they are watching their pennies, so what is it ? I mean do people really shop this way ? Are they really  working out in their heads before buying that “tonight we will have slice of bread with one slice of headcheese each and tomorrow I have one for breakfast while he (the husband) has cooked ham for breakfast” . Do they ? Is there something wrong with me that I don’t have such precise planing ? Shall I be looking into it ? Please tell me if that is the case... I hope I am not loosing the marbles yet, and looking at the reaction of the lady behind the counter I wasn’t the only one who found it totally bizarre..... 

Another day, another pill....

Another day, another pill,

Taken precisely at the given time.

Will I get dizzy, will I be ill ?

Will I not know what I really feel ?

Another day, another pill,

On empty stomach, I need to remember.

Are these pills working ? I feel awful chill.

I no longer know whats dream and whats real.  

Another day, another pill,

Very sore stomach and a rash on my skin.

Despite these problems, I’m very strong still

And I’ll keep fighting and I will win.

Another day, another pill,

I’ve learned to live the life on treatment.

The years will pass and with God’s will

I will be with you, if you want me still.

Another day, my very last pill,

I won’t be needing any more treatment.

They found the cure, they found the pill.

Yes, this is dream, but so very real !

RR, May 2011